Lawyering (Points for...Honesty?)

We cringed at THIS embarrassment. Honestly, we could snark about this until the cows come home but there's really not much more we can add. Answer here for the non-litigators.

Speaking of lawyering, we thought this bit about insider trading was interesting and serves as a cautionary tale to those who are uber-cavalier about talking themselves up. You know the types. There are industry folks who are so insecure that they feel the need to constantly show off what deals they are working on. Makes good cocktail party conversation. But, a number of these companies have publicly traded equity or securities. While the insider trading laws are murky and ever-changing, we're pretty sure that industry folks don't want to find themselves on the other side of an investigation. Moreover, we're guessing that, at least in a few instances, the mere disclosure is a breach of attorney-client privilege. So, don't do that. 

Recruiting: More Genius Ideas to Differentiate Your Firm

Go Long Perks

So, if pop-ups are too complicated, you could always go the perk route and, gawdammit, if biglaw and finance ought to derive inspiration from anyone it may as well be the geniuses on Sand Hill Road. Want your car gassed-up while your werk werk werking that conference call like a boss? Well, there's an app for that. Actually, several, and they all share an affinity for bad name-brands, e.g., Booster FuelsInstaFuelWeFuelFilld and our personal favorite, Bankrupt. Ok, just kidding about that last one. But, we're very excited for the inevitable launch of G-uber, Gyft, and AirbnG. Seriously, bros, InstaFuel and WeFuel? Ugh. Choice quote, “'I live and work in Silicon Valley. If there’s an app to deliver something, we’re usually the first ones to jump on it....'" Is there a service that will deliver this dude a gun so he can be put out of his bro-y misery? Elsewhere in perk land, why not convince your Management Committee to beta test Walmart's ($WMT) latest and greatest technology which will deliver needed products directly to your office. Think about it: that time you spend going to the physical Walmart location or local Walgreens could now be put to MUCH better use. Like, you know, billing. To top it off, maybe your firm can offer you the Hello Alfred amenity so that you never have to bother with restocking your home fridge or picking up dry-cleaning. After all, that's time that could be spent doing much more worthwhile sh*t like...billing.

Healthcare (Short Predictions, Long Distress)

"What comes next?" we asked back in June. Looks like a lot of professionals are becoming increasingly convinced that '18 will be rife with healthcare activity as distress rises to "epidemic" levels. Hmmm. Okay. We'll see. Distress watchlists in the space DO seem to be expanding with names like HCR ManorcareGenesis Healthcare Corporation ($GEN), Prime Healthcare Services Inc.Signature Healthcare LLC, and Community Health Systems ($CYH), among many others. Meanwhile, to the degree that healthcare providers are suffering from regulatory and other headwinds, management may want to move data security up higher on their list of priorities. After all, 21st Century Oncology Holdings and Morehead Memorial Hospital both serve as examples of what can happen when precautions aren't implemented early. One last note on healthcare distress, looks like biglaw attorneys aren't immune to increased healthcare spending. According to Abovethelaw.com, certain biglaw shops aresurreptitiously passing the cost of rising healthcare coverage costs to their associates. Living the dream.

Recruiting & Business Development (Long Innovation)

Think Outside the Box, We Say

We can't seem to get over our own obsession with private equity/biglaw/bank recruiting; we've written about it herehere and here. Why? Mostly because its stupid-absurd which, in turn, makes it funny. But after reading about the rise of corporate pop-ups here, we came up with what we think is a genius way to jumpstart business development and recruiting efforts in one fell swoop: a biglaw pop-up store. Stick with us here: picture a mall with next-wave bankruptcy candidates like Charming CharlieNine WestBon-Ton Stores ($BONT), Sears Corporation ($SHLD), Destination XL ($DXLG), Destination Maternity ($DEST), etc. (collectively, the "Effed Retailers"). Picture, also, within close proximity, a corporate pop-up for, say, Law Firm AB&C LLP featuring all kinds of fancy screens rolling clips of how bada$$ and extreme its attorneys are while arguing (or singing) in court on behalf of retail clients. Imagine the product placement opportunities for the likes of Payless Shoesourcerue21 Inc.Gymboree, and True Religion (the "Successfully Reorganized Retailers"). "Stop by the AB&C LLP popup for awesome limited edition kicks and 'lit' specialty women's apparel," they'll say. In the opposite corner there can be a skull-and-crossbones banner hovering over an ominous display of retail carnage, e.g., hhgregg, Gander Mountain, etc. - all of which were, conveniently, of course, represented by other firms. Like, literally, a pair of running kicks should be on fire and death metal ought to be playing on the loud speaker. Of course, the managers of the Effed Retailers will see this and, in a panicked frenzy, start dialing corporate HQ asking, "Who is our Restructuring counsel?" Oh, really? Fire them. We need to hire AB&C LLP stat!" Meanwhile the Successfully Reorganized Retailers will generate some revenue from the product placement which, of course, they'll want to pay back when they inevitably are no longer "successful" and need to file for Chapter 22. Cha Ching! Another retention. Don't forget the REITs: Simon Property Group ($SPG) can continue to boast about 97% occupancy rates thanks to AB&C LLP filing space. And, finally, think of the branding potential. Law students and future law students will walk by and say "Holy crap. I want to go work at THAT law firm, AB&C LLP." Massive cross-benefit for recruiting. Whichever of your firms deploys this strategy first can send royalties via Paypal to petition@petition11.com.

Notable (Cov Lite Loans, Delaware Bankruptcy Filings & More)

More = Busted Tech, Investment Banks & REITS

Biglaw. Summer Associate satisfaction surveys (firewall). In case anyone actually gives a sh*t.

Busted Tech. A view that recent IPOs will never make money. Meanwhile, Toys R Us is a harbinger of, you guessed it, BUSTED TECH. 

Canadian Retail. Also looking increasingly ugly.

Cov Lite. We're old enough to remember when people said it was dead and would never come back. Memories are short AF

DelawareThis article about retail bankruptcy cases avoiding filing in Delaware misses the mark widely. Like, way outside. Any DE practitioners want to opine - without attribution - on this?? Email us here.

Investment BankingJefferies can't trade for sh*t but advisory fees baby. Given these advisory fees, it looks like UBS wants to get back into the restructuring advisory game. Again. For, like, the 283th time. 

J.CrewInvestors are pissed.

New YorkIs it in danger of becoming Detroit?

Puerto Rico. The hits just keep on coming. Sad, really.

REIT InvestmentsThis is an interesting piece about alternative investments by REITS. Simon Property Group ($SPG) looks particularly active.

Retail (Taxes). When you're industry is in secular decline, fight for scraps. Here, tax changes.